Topic: Personal Problems

[Abnormal Freak]

Hey yo let's bring back this ancient thread that only a handful of people will remember but in which everyone can participate.

Share your woes, vent your frustrations, do all that pathetic chit that will make others reel back and exclaim, "Wow, what a loser!"



I'm currently without a job for the first time since I was 12. I've worked for my dad these past twenty years but in January, our business partner suddenly shut down. They were a wholesale bread bakery who handled all the billing and customer relations, while we did the pastries in a separate facility. Getting enough customers to earn a sustainable income has been difficult, and for a time it slowed to a stop, forcing me to get a full-time job at a warehouse.

Most the dudes there liked me except for the boss. My supervisor wanted to give me a lead shipping position but the bossman pulled that rug from under me. Instead he moved me to another department with a 50 cent pay increase (but only after I fought for it). Trouble is, I wasn't happy in that position, and upon bringing my concerns to HR, they fired my ass, lol. Too bad, because the pay was OK, the hours were good, and I had lost 20 pounds while working there over the course of three months. Getting fired was a surprise; I thought at most they'd just tell me to man up, but I guess the boss felt my words were an affront against him, that I was throwing my raise in his face.

The job was also beneficial in that it worked out the kinks I had in my back for months after an icy spin-out car accident where I slammed into a ditch going 60+ MPH. Thankfully I got a decent insurance payout from that, which helped me sustain myself for a few months while income was small. The payout and the warehouse job got me enough money to pay till the end of my apartment lease, after which my broke ass moved back in with my parents.



Fast forward to now (been back home since late June), I've been helping my dad do a few different farmers' markets. I'm doing this to earn my keep and also to benefit my dad, because he's got a mortgage and hefty electric bill to pay; he can't afford to pay me right now, but I know he needs the help. The markets will end at the end of the month or possibly a little into October, at which point he may once again be back to having infrequent orders—although we just got an order from an old regular who always gets a 16-dozen standing order whenever there's a Sunday afternoon Vikings home game, so perhaps we can snag a few more customers to get through the winter.

So this leaves me wondering where to go for work. For fun, I was thinking of applying to a local haunted hayride. I don't know what they pay but the hiring event is Wednesday, so that might be a fun part-time thing to do and earn a little money just to get by, until reality sets in and I have to get a real job, lol. Currently I have a whopping $100 in my bank account, and that's reserved for my auto insurance.

Meanwhile, I sometimes sell off old stuff to get some quick cash. Got $90 the other week, I'm sure I could get another couple hundred if I'm willing to let go of some things. Having almost no money and having to scrape by is tough, but I've got a roof over my head so it's not like the end of the world, but when you suffer from anxiety and depression, it can sometimes feel like the weight of the world is coming down on ya, and those thoughts of leaping off the Stillwater St. Croix bridge can be hard to stifle.



I just don't know what I'm doing with my life. I had hoped by now to have proposed to my girlfriend and had a good chunk of money to put as a down-payment on a house. Lately it just feels like my stupid ass is failing at everything, so I numb the pain (lol '90s nu-metal lyrix) by playing a shitload of video games. And to fuck that up, my PS2 died today so everything sucks, lol.



So what's everyone else's troubles? Post 'em if you think it'll help to get it off your chest.

[zangetsu468]

@Abnormal Freak That's rough dude. Maybe take the PS2 packing up as a sign for the moment. Try to shelf the games while there are bigger life hurdles to conquer. 

My frustration is not for me but for my best mate. Every 6 months he shares with me how his relationship isn't working. I give him the best advice I can for the scenario, given he is living with his partner and they have animals together etc. He'll make it sound Armageddon-esque, and I know he shares these concerns with his brother. Basically his partner, she is a struggling artist and is always breaking his balls about shit. I've told him he's running a household (financially and otherwise) and she will never leave him because she will never a) find a place that accepts their animals, presuming she takes them, and b) their current situation is too much of a good thing for her; living in an affluent part of suburbia she'd never normally be able to afford. Low and behold in the past she started packing her bag at 11pm, then stopped half-way through and said "Can we talk?".... He we are 6 months later. It frustrates me being I was in a similar situation a decade ago, he was by my side, but he still can't decipher these relationship hieroglyphics. I hate to admit it, but it's also making me dislike her more and more, the more information he's feeding me. So in the end I just avoid any social situations where she's going to be. I don't have the heart to tell him that his drip-feeding me this information is making me resent her. (how can I not, when he is my best friend) I hope he sorts himself out soon. He's a very good man, but his failing is that he's indecisive and it's only with relationships - he's successful at everything else. He's just too afraid of being alone.

[Mooning Freddy]

Sounds tough, AF. Unfortunately I don't have many work tips. It's about looking hard to find the best that you can find for your current situation then seeing where you can proceed from there.

I am in an odd situation in my life. About 5 months ago I got engaged with my gf of two years and we love each other a lot. We are organizing a wedding that is to take place in 6 months.
In the professional field, I finally got "a real job", a solid one that I am relatively happy with. The pay isn't great but it's an excellent place to launch my career. My work isn't difficult and coworkers and boss are just great. Couldn't ask for a better company.

Our families, on the other hand, are f**ked-up. My fiancee's mother is handicapped and highly dependent on her; she hopes to undertake a surgery soon that will hopefully allow her some independence but it's still unclear what will come out of it. The mother is both physically and psychologically dependent on her, and I don't know what would happen once we move in together (my fiancee and I still don't live together). My family is in the worst crisis it has ever been through. My parents have never been a perfect couple, yet they stuck together. Now the family is experiencing an economic and personal crisis and my father seems to be quite literally going mad while behaving like everything is fine. TBH I'm sick of that bu***hit. I can't wait to move in with my fiancee so I don't have to deal with the family's garbage anymore.
I lived alone through my college years and felt much more stable. I celebrated my 29th birthday recently and all my dad did was criticize me. I finally have a reasonable job and I'm about to start my own family and he decided the best thing to do on my birthday is talk about how irresponsible I am because I don't care about money and a high standard of living like him. Your family is falling apart because the only thing you ever cared about was money, and you keep on giving me the same annoying lectures you gave me since... Forever? I am so friggin' tired of my family. Yeah, they are not a bad family and provided me with everything I needed, if only they actually cared about how me and my sister felt. If they actually talked to us instead of lecturing us.
Oh well, nobody's perfect.

[X]

Abnormal Freak@ You know you can get the law on your side if your former boss pulled a shit stunt like that all because he did like you. You do have rights and nobody -not even him- should get away with that kind of behavior at a job.

-He's biased against you for no reason.
-He sabotaged you getting a better placement because he didn't like you.
-he fired you for standing up to him.

This guy is shit. Take this @$$hole to court.

[Belmontoya]

Sorry to hear of your troubles man.

Go to the Carpenters Union in St Paul. We're always recruiting.

Great pay and benefits even as an apprentice starting out.

Best of luck!

[Abnormal Freak]

The one off Olive Street? Our old business partner was literally one block away.

[BLOOD MONKEY]

Not really a problem anymore, but just left an emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive relationship that lasted for well over a year.

[Belmontoya]

The one off Olive Street? Our old business partner was literally one block away.

Yeah man that's it! If you do it look into trades of interior systems. I do acoustical ceilings.

[zangetsu468]

Not really a problem anymore, but just left an emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive relationship that lasted for well over a year.

That sucks man. Hopefully you're in a better place now.

[X]

Not really a problem anymore, but just left an emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive relationship that lasted for well over a year.

Was there no way of getting out of such a toxic relationship earlier?

[BLOOD MONKEY]

Was there no way of getting out of such a toxic relationship earlier?

I didn't really want to. When things were fine, they were great. I really did love her a lot, and she loved me too, but she had some serious issues that prevented that.

What made me end it was the fact that I moved from Alabama to Wisconsin. If not for that, I'd still be there, with her...

[zangetsu468]

I didn't really want to. When things were fine, they were great. I really did love her a lot, and she loved me too, but she had some serious issues that prevented that.

What made me end it was the fact that I moved from Alabama to Wisconsin. If not for that, I'd still be there, with her...

I can understand the position you were in holistically (although I can't say I was physically or sexually abused) with not wanting to leave. I was in a similar position almost 10 years ago.
At the time I didn't really want to leave either, but it was the right thing to do for more reasons than one.

[Lumi Kløvstad]

Not really a problem, but more like a nagging worry.

My parents left the country on a 37th wedding anniversary trip a couple days ago, and since they landed in Scotland, neither I or my sister can raise them on the phone, email, social media, etc.

My head tells me they probably have just disconnected everything to enjoy the trip, but my sister, always one to panic first and ask questions later, has managed to instill just enough of the "BUT WHAT IF SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED HOW WOULD WE KNOW" fear that now I can't fucking sleep.

So thanks, sis.

You're a fuckload of help.

[Dracula9]

reminder that this is scotland we're talking about

one of three things would happen if they'd been attacked or whatever:

-the attackers would've taken them for a pint or seven afterwards and there would be bar selfies

-the rest of all nearby scottish would engage in confrontation on their behalf and the conflict would be heard of on every news station in the country due to the level of uniquely scottish asswhipping involved

-they'd wait until they were back home, then you would all wake up one day to see an army of scottish outside on the lawn with the one in front painting half his face blue and declaring war for their freedom

if none of those three have happened you're almost doubtless in the clear

[X]

I'd have to side with D9 on this 

Lumi@ It'd be worse if they were in Ireland and they caught wind that one of your parents was (hypothetically) related to Oliver Cromwell. Then they'd really be in deep s@#t. So count your blessings and give your worrywart sister a piece of your mind. It'll be the necessary medicine she needs to (hopefully some extent) calm down.