I look at Van Helsing much like Underworld as a whole -- good bit of campy fun, just don't think too hard about most of it.
That and:
-Kate Beckinsale actually getting to use her regular voice/accent
-A pretty fucking underrated Dracula performance IMO, despite the camp, and one that breaks the Lugosi mold in a way I really enjoy
-Kate Beckinsale kicking ass in Victorian gear
-Kate Beckinsale
Basically a good solid fun summer popcorn flick. Sometimes we throw popcorn at the screen because of the narminess, but that's just one more reason I love it.
"It's ok for the movie to be bad because it knows it's not serious." No. Just no. I love plenty of non serious movies, and hardly the type to demand serious grittiness. VanHelsing is a terrible movie. I remember when it came out in theaters, I don't think I've ever been as excited for a movie. It was clearly a Castlevania RIP off, and I LOVED that. I remember watching tv behind the scenes specials before release. I played the game and was the first person to post a screen cap of the Belmont reference on the ancient dungeon forum, I still love the game. I even still go back and watch the movie every so many years trying to like it. It is just a bad, bad, bad movie. And I enjoy the Subspecies franchise. It deserves the repuation it has. The animated mini prequel was about as bad too.
I'm really sorry AlexCalvo that you don't enjoy the movie as many of us do -- for my friends it's been an annual Halloween event since the movie first came out much as there have been fans of
The Rocky Horror Picture Show since it first hit the stage. I don't think
Van Helsing will ultimately have the sort of timeless cheese that Rocky has, but it's still an apt comparison, because "Fun" does never equates with "Good" in and of itself.
Van Helsing isn't terrible by any objective measure (critics are NOT an objective measure, nor is
Rotten Tomatoes, which is built around critics), but it's demonstrably not a good one either. Which is precisely why we who like it happen to like it. Like
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter,
Pride, Prejudice, and Zombies, or dare I say it,
Snakes on a (muthafuckin') Plane, the fun of the experience is decidedly not the objective quality production of the film. Instead, for every moment of intentionally crafted enjoyment
Van Helsing has to offer, there are two more moments of ironic enjoyment that are drawn precisely out of the campy nature of the film. Which again, the movie is carefully and deliberately constructed around that type of viewing. It's not for everyone, and it seems that you aren't in the crowd it was intended for. It's sad, but it's not the end of anybody's world -- no film will win everybody over. You gave it a good shot at trying to like it, which is more than most non-fans can be expected to do; a lot of people dislike films despite never even having seen them or understood what it's about, or having gone to it with the intention of finding something to rip apart, which is almost as bad.
You gave it a shot, and it didn't pan out. Shame, but good on you for trying.
I fully anticipate that this Netflix Castlevania project is destined to be highly divisive among us fans in much the same way though. There are going to be people who love it, and those who hate it. I will probably wind up as one of those who will shrug and go "Well, at least they tried. Gold star for effort". I'd love to be proven wrong by being treated to an absolutely on-the-nose spectacle crafted by true fans of the saga who understand all the ins and outs of the property like
Captain America: Winter Soldier was, but after years of bad games to other-media adaptations, I've learned a certain degree of detachment and cynicism.
Though I also really liked the Assassin's Creed and Warcraft films after I saw them, so I'm hardly the most objective viewpoint.
In my defense, I was also expecting those to be
much worse than they ended up being. If nothing else they are very faithful adaptations that wound up looking very bland against a backdrop of many much more interesting films in 2016 (the one damn thing that year did right, imo).