Castlevania Dungeon Forums
Off Topic => Off Topic => Topic started by: Lumi Kløvstad on August 19, 2012, 11:10:40 PM
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First off, you should know that I'm a follower of Asatru, which is a modern name for the religion of my ancestors, the Vikings (or more properly the modern incarnation of said religion).
I consult my Gods whenever I feel I should, and I do my best to bring them honor and glory, even if I cannot do so through battle as my ancestors did.
My parents (whom I still live with until I ship off to college later this year) are dyed in the wool Christians, and my sister just... doesn't care. Christian on paper, but never actually goes to church or does anything particularly religious. We've all met the type.
Anyway, I was speaking to my mother about some of the old stories of Odin and Frigga a few days ago (specifically where Odin learns what makes a true hero), and she smiled (kind of) and said "they're nice stories, but it hurts me that you would follow fictional characters instead of the One God."
I expected THOSE particular words from many other people. But never my own mother.
I wasn't telling the story with intent to convert her from Christianity, merely because I, like my ancestors, thought she might find the story enlightening or entertaining.
So it greatly offends me that she would say such a thing about my religion and beliefs (which is the first belief system I've ever felt truly comfortable with) especially when I would never try to sway HER from Christianity, which has obviously worked well for her but not for me.
Between most Christians I've now met and my mother, my impressions are now that the tenants of "love thy neighbor", "tolerance", and "judge not lest ye be judged" of Christianity are upheld by it's followers merely when convenient, and I know these kinds of impressions can be greatly damaging if they are permitted to persist.
I know that Thor would tell me to be strong, Odin would urge me to keep a cool head and behave rationally and responsibly, and Freyja would tell me to love my mother, even if she does not believe the way I do.
And I really want to do these things, because I believe in that sort of wisdom. But right now it's hard. If I walked up to you and called your beliefs a work of fiction, I doubt that you'd take it very well either. It's hard enough coming from a stranger, but harder still coming from your own mother whom you have lived with and trusted completely for 23 years.
It shouldn't matter who a person worships as divine, as long as that worship shapes them into a good and honorable person, in my opinion.
So I'd like some advice from my internet family, who I'm frankly feeling better about at the moment. Do I let this lie, do I try to talk to my mother about it, or do I do something else?
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The old Viking religions are still followed today? That's pretty badass. I didnt know that.
I can't offer advice, other than try and talk to your Mother and explain to her how you feel. Would she say the same about Hinduism, for example? or Buddhism? Christianity, Islam, and Judaism all follow the same main God, so that's why there's a certain kind of tolerance there, despite radically different ways of practice. But would she consider Hinduism, for example, to be "fun stories" or Buddha to be "an amusing chubby character"? or does she feel that way merely because the Norse Gods have become part of modern pop culture by now, along with the Vikings themselves, much like Pirates or Ninjas have?
Or for a twist, ask her how she would feel if you considered the Bible just "fun stories" and that you are disappointed she would "follow fictional characters instead of the true Gods".
Talk. Talking is key. Try to make her understand how you feel.
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Of course you should talk about it, but, uh...
Or for a twist, ask her how she would feel if you considered the Bible just "fun stories" and that you are disappointed she would "follow fictional characters instead of the true Gods".
This might not be so advisable if she were as hard-line as you make her out to be. She might take it the wrong way and think you actually feel that way, and...the consequences might be rather grave...
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OK, let me get this straight. You talked to a member of another region about your own different religion, and expected them to take your story seriously? You have some very strange expectations. You were setting yourself up for failure right there.
Also, nice generalizing by labeling all Christians you know as hypocrites, you drunk barbaric viking.
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To be fair, Uzo, it was his mother. It's not *that* strange to expect Mom to cut you a little extra slack.
That said, if all your mother said was that she's "sad" you don't follow her religion, I don't think that's much to complain about. As uzo noted, not all Christians are like that, but there are some who're better and some who're quite a bit worse (and this goes for all religions too--and non-religions as well, come to think about it). If I were you, I'd just let this lie. People (including family members) have called things I believed in very strongly "silly" for a long time. Part of having beliefs, and part of being a responsible adult in regards to those beliefs, is an understanding that many if not most people will not only disagree with them but find them to be ludicrous or stupid. If that's all they think, shrug your shoulders and agree to disagree--it's no skin off your back, and more importantly, if your beliefs turn out to be correct, it's their problem, not yours.
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To be fair, Uzo, it was his mother. It's not *that* strange to expect Mom to cut you a little extra slack.
That said, if all your mother said was that she's "sad" you don't follow her religion, I don't think that's much to complain about. As uzo noted, not all Christians are like that, but there are some who're better and some who're quite a bit worse (and this goes for all religions too--and non-religions as well, come to think about it). If I were you, I'd just let this lie. People (including family members) have called things I believed in very strongly "silly" for a long time. Part of having beliefs, and part of being a responsible adult in regards to those beliefs, is an understanding that many if not most people will not only disagree with them but find them to be ludicrous or stupid. If that's all they think, shrug your shoulders and agree to disagree--it's no skin off your back, and more importantly, if your beliefs turn out to be correct, it's their problem, not yours.
Pretty much this, but do expect it to come up again around Christmas. You're about to go to college so you're at a very formative stage of your life right now. It's cliche but true that you are "discovering yourself" and your parents are probably hoping that your new belief system is a phase you will grow out of, which it may or may not be.
I spent years studying religions before I decided on my path (none of the above) and one thing I have come to understand is that people are very defensive about their religion.
Since a faith-based belief system is by definition founded on stories and customs grounded in belief without evidence, getting the agreement of a group is important to people. "God really exists right guys?" "Yeah yeah of course he does." that kind of thing, and dissenters who challenge this group reinforcement are to be dealt with harshly. Moreover your mother and father's religion does not allow for other gods unlike Hinduism or the other prominent eastern faiths.
With the Abrahamic tradition it is (or has become) an all-or-nothing deal. When you tell her you believe in other gods, you're telling her you don't think her god exists or is the true God. So consider that your mom likely views your choosing another faith as a diss to her own, just as she has dismissed yours.
Coupled with this your parents may sincerely believe that you (like all non-Christians) are being purposely misled by the devil and/or demons. It was (and I believe still is) a common tactic of Christian missionaries to preach that local Gods such as Odin and Thor are demons trying to keep people from Yahweh, and the idea has persisted. They may be thinking that if you continue to worship the way you do you will be sentenced to eternal torture, which would make most parents sad.
PS - If it's any help you can tell her that in Viking graves that have been excavated there have been individuals who had with them symbols of both Mjölnir and the Christian cross. So some of your ancestors may have been looking to hedge their spiritual bets even back then.
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Well, Sigurd, all I can tell you is this:
My grandmother has a huge, two-part Soviet encyclopedia of religion. It's a really good one, with loads of info about all religions and beliefs known to history. I doubt there are encyclopedias today which are as good as this one.
You know how it's called? It's called: "Mythology of the world's nations"
When you think about the word mythology, what comes to mind is usually tales about ancient Greece, Scandinavia or Babylonia.
But not in this encyclopedia. Alongside tales about Zeus, Thor and Baal, there are tales about Christ, Muhammad and Buddha.
I once used to think, isn't it extremely offensive to Christians and Muslims that their history is seen as equal to ancient mythology, which almost nobody believes in anymore? But than I thought about it, and said "meh". Why should you discriminate between religions? It's quite the hypocrisy. Either you respect all religions or you ditch all religions. It's all about equality. 8)
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What does a middle eastern man that claims to be the son of The One True God have anything to do with people of European ancestry? Not much.
As far as I think not many people would follow monotheistic (Hinduism and Buddhism are probably also guilty of oppressing other peoples with their polytheism) religions if it weren't for them sticking their noses into "heathens" business.
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To be fair, Uzo, it was his mother. It's not *that* strange to expect Mom to cut you a little extra slack.
I'd actually contest that it is the opposite. Think about it; A christian mother hearing her son talk about worshiping heathen gods, in her eyes something that would damn him to hell for an eternity of torture. For her, this is grounds for intervention, much less dismissing it as fiction. The typical reaction here is to get him set straight before it's too late.
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I think it's a bit arrogant to think one's religion is "the correct faith" and all the rest were made up by people who were obviously on crack or something like that. Perhaps all religions have some sort of truth to them? If you want to believe in Norse gods but don't want to upset your family why don't you just say your believes might be compatible with theirs? Perhaps the Norse gods were actually angels and people mistook took them to be gods? I'm not religious at all but it's an interesting way to approach things.
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In situations like this,it would probably best to maybe talk about it when you think is right ;). All religions have their own ways of solving problems like this,and if you're uncomfortable with your mom's sudden change of religion no problem in talking.This is how I felt when I found out my brother was an atheist. :'(
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I like to approach religion from a historical point of view, and to say the least, I think it's damn amazing how such a tiny nation as the Jews, which didn't have a history of magnificence as other nations like the Assyrians, Persians or Greeks, managed to spread belief in their god to most of the world. To be fair, I have to say the Jewish faith in a universal god was very revolutionary 2000 years ago, when most of the world had conceptions of local gods, i.e. believed that every part of the world has its own gods and that people who travel around the world should respect the local gods. I can see how belief in a universal god can appeal to people, especially politicians who sought world dominance like the Romans.
Of course, then nations used their gods as a political tool, which isn't unusual. If you want people to follow you back then, you needed to show them you have (a) god on your side.
So my point is: religion should only be judged by the historical period when they appeared. The tales of Jesus and Muhammad are very similar: both revolutionaries, both disliked the communities they lived in because they were corrupt and immoral. The difference is that Muhammad gained political power and recognition in his lifetime, while Jesus only centuries after his death.
So in the past people fought each other in the name of their gods, while in fact the true reasons for fighting were political.
Today people believe in the same god, but fight because they disagree on his right way of living, and this is often an illusion as well, covering the true, political reasons of fighting.
Plato and Aristotle explained this centuries before Jesus and Muhammad walked the earth. Now THOSE are people worthy of my worship!
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You my friend freddy just made a very valid and informational point :). You sir have earned a gold medal wonderful job! *claps* I am being serious good point.
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Word, good stuff, Freddy.
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So in the past people fought each other in the name of their gods, while in fact the true reasons for fighting were political.
Today people believe in the same god, but fight because they disagree on his right way of living, and this is often an illusion as well, covering the true, political reasons of fighting.
Examples being land, money, resources, and "glory"?
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Asatru isn't a religion FYI. It is Pagan spirituality. There is quite a difference between spirituality and organized religion. Spirituality is something everyone has in common and that is self-exploration; to be one with thy self and find your god-center or your sacred inner temple. Religion is about gathering many followers, following strict rules (Dogma) and expected to pay homage to the worshiped god in question. After-all for religion; more followers means more power and wealth. I for one am heavy into Spirituality as I find organized Religion unrealistic in many of it's aspects and views and the Dogmatic rules are no-longer applicable, let alone acceptable in today's society. Jesus Christ (Yeshua) was a spiritualist. He taught his people about the god-centered self. To look inward and discover their true spiritual identities. To realize that every single person (Man, Woman, Child, Race) were all God's children (not just Jesus), important and equal in the eyes of God. But it was only after his death that his teachings (some of which were altered or dropped all-together) were transformed into the Religious organization known as Pauline Christianity. Jesus was also a man who didn't mince words when talking about organized religion. He disliked their ways and methods and called them all Hypocrites. If he were here now and could see how his teachings were transformed by his fellow man, he would condemn the Vatican as being hypocritical.
For those who don't know what the word means here's a dictionary example:
1. A person who puts on a false appearance of virtue or religion.
2. A person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs and feelings.
-Hypocrite
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Yep, X, you nailed it.
There's quite a difference between religion and faith. The very IDEA of religion is fairly new, only centuries old, because ages ago people couldn't dream of separation of church and state. Religion WAS the state. In the ancient world the state's laws were religious laws and those who didn't follow them were punished. People could not imagine living without religion as it was their faith, the only possible way of living for them. When talking about the Jews in the bible, I think you should say "the faith of the Jews" rather than "the Jewish religion".
So yeah, it is only when mankind progressed and realized a state could exist without gods and "their laws" that religions became what they are today. You probably know this, but in classic Islam, for instance, separation of church and state is blasphemy.
Like I said before, I was amazed by how Plato explained this in his "Republic". He explained that a strong state should manipulate religion/faith to fit its targets. So ahead of his time... Any philosopher writing that in the middle ages would have been beheaded, lol...
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You can't explain it any better you know? I learn new things everyday. ;D
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You can't explain it any better you know? I learn new things everyday. ;D
I am happy when there are people who are interested in my opinion. Often I feel that I'm talking to myself. ;D
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I'm pretty sure if nothing else Jesus would have a VERY hard time swallowing the Crusades or the Inquisitions. I mean, the Inquisition in particular. There's just no excuse for that kind of bullshit.
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I wanted to mention the Crusades, Flame. Couple of days ago watched a program about them.
In some history book, the author referred to the Crusades as "the first wave of European imperialism". I chuckled at first, but then thought about it, and came to conclusion that he's right. It's amazing how far apart legends about the crusades are from reality.
The legends tell about brave knights of England, France and Italy who decided to liberate the Holy Land from the Arab rulers who conquered it centuries earlier, in the name of their true faith.
The reality? The knights were second-rate princes who had little power by right of birth, who sought dominance but had no way to achieve it in Europe. The leaders of the Church, disturbed by the unrest in the middle east and fearing the spread of Islam through Turkey into Europe, and at the same time afraid battles-for-power within Europe intensifying, decided getting rid of the princes by sending them on a crazy journey to the middle east would be a good idea.
And so the European Crusaders went on a journey to a land they only heard of in legends, and where Europeans hadn't set foot since the dawn of the Roman Empire.
And the Crusades themselves? Massacres of proportions the Middle East has yet to see before. The crusaders killed everybody, men, women and children alike, Muslims, Jews and even Christians. The Arab conquests centuries earlier seemed nice in comparison to their cruelty. Crusaders sought alliances with local cities, only to betray and destroy them. It is said they even practiced cannibalism to frighten their enemies.
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Not to mention that the Crusades worked out well for "His Holiness" the Pope, who could get rid of troublesome princes and knights and use them to increase the size of his empire with a single decree. And so when a lot of them never came back, it didn't trouble the man ONE BIT. He was playing Human lives in a manner even worse than the Caesars.
Caesar said: "Go conquer this far and away land. Why? Because I fucking told you to and I pay you to do what I tell you to do."
Pope said: "Go conquer this far and away land. Why? Why because if you do this, you're GUARANTEED A PLACE IN HEAVEN, dear boy! Nevermind that you'll be dead broke afterwards and will probably not see your families again for at least 8 to 10 years (if at all) and your sons won't even recognize their father if--- I mean WHEN you return! JUST THINK OF THE SALVATION!!!"
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I'd like to reply to a claim that certain Christians behave in an arrogant manner thinking that their god of choice is the One True God and there is no other besides that particular deity.
Well. It comes with the territory. Monoteistic religions overall claim their deity is the Single True One and the other religions are all fake. The latest developments thanks to Popes John Paul II and Benedict XVI towards "ecumenism" aka more friendly terms between religions may be misleading you into thinking otherwise, but take a look inside the Bible or the Quran -- in these scriptures it's clearly stated that there's just one God and all other religions are fueled by demonic propaganda.
How does that differ from the old politeistic belief systems such as Roman or Greek ones for example. They gladly adopted many middle-eastern and some African deities, not forgetting about sacrifices for Hera/Juno or Jupiter/Zeus. I am no specialist in that field, so I cannot tell you how things looked like with Norse beliefs, but I can tell you this: a religion's 'arrogance' that is the claim that only one god is true is the actual source of conflicts! After all, a believer often feels compelled to eradicate any mention of the 'false' religions in order to protect his/her brethren in faith. That's the source of monoteistic religions' followers' fanatism and I've experienced it firsthand, sadly. I may tell more if asked.
So, dear Sigurd, I'd be careful when discussing matters of faith when talking to your mother. She won't respect your gods or anything related to them -- her religion explicitly prohibits her to. And her motherly care for you means she will try to sway you from your beliefs in order to save you. I'd advise you to just politely discourage her from trying and also avoid talking matters of faith with her. Unless of course you're willing to give in and agree with her stance, which I don't see coming.
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That makes me remember a sig that I've seen years ago, something like that:
"I've readed the bible, good book, but the author have been unwise in killing all characters, eliminating all the chances of a sequel"
But I believe in God 8)
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Sucks your mom didn't understand, but I'd have to say let it lie. My cousin's family still tries to control this particular cousin with religion (and is doing a damn good job at it) & the cousin is nearly 30 years old. I mean, here's a 29 year old who can't date person XYZ because, "They're dangerous! XYZ doesn't believe in the Lord, so there's nothing holding them back from murdering you! They aren't afraid of hell!". Yeah, this was said to an adult person with a serious face. More than once. On different occasions...yeah.
Also, my mom has came at me with a knife more than once over living my life in a way she didn't much care for, pitched unopened soda cans at my head for just going out with friends after work (I'm 27 btw), even threatened me with a tire iron when I had an auto accident, 'cuz, ya know, accident implies "calculated action" in her world when it comes to me. I'm sure she'll do half of this shit again before we're dead; I'm sure she's got new crazy cookin' up for me as I'm typing this, she's just got to wait for me slip up. I just get over it because she's my mom. It hurts when a parent isn't on board with something so near & dear to the very core of your being (I'm thinking your spirituality/religion is a pretty big deal to you as it is with most folks), but she still loves you & only said she said out of genuine concern for you. Think what you'd say if Odin, for example, said, "Dude, if your mom's not on board with me before her time's out, I gotta make her live with the frost giants. Them's the breaks." I'm sure you'd try to convince her because nobody wants their mother in that frozen wasteland. I hope that didn't seem offensive, none whatsoever intended, just needed a rad example.
It was a well meaning comment that just didn't quite have the effect she thought it would. It sounded like she was holding back too, trying to use a delicate touch-I gotta say, if she's as big into Christianity as you say, that was a classy way of maneuvering on her part. Talk it out, hug it out & I love to top stuff like this off with tasty homemade waffles...I can post the recipe if anybody's interested. Seriously, no syrup needed, these things are flippin' delicious & courtesy of my mom's crazy brain. <3
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tasty homemade waffles...I can post the recipe if anybody's interested
Please do, thanks.
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I'd actually contest that it is the opposite. Think about it; A christian mother hearing her son talk about worshiping heathen gods, in her eyes something that would damn him to hell for an eternity of torture. For her, this is grounds for intervention, much less dismissing it as fiction. The typical reaction here is to get him set straight before it's too late.
Why are you supporting the "typical reaction" when you already chastised him for generalizing the Christian faith?
And on that particular note, I'm going to piggyback off of the last few posts regarding the Crusades and whatnot. There's a difference between generalizing an entire faith based on what few interactions one has had in comparison to the whole religion and being aware of the quote-unquote extremists in that religion's history. I believe he mentioned that that only applied to the Christians he had met, but I'm not sure. I'm already in this post and the recent posts don't go back that far. I'll edit if need be. But anyway, I have no problem pointing out the fallacies in established religion, most notably the Christian faith. Why them? Because they've got the most chips on the table and the most skeletons in their closet IMO. Most of the Bible's stories are either derived from or blatantly copied from previous religions or spiritualities(which the Christians most likely overrun, slaughtered, and demonized for their own political power regime), and the Church has omitted a large amount of Biblical stories which often times contradict what they at the time considered dangerous to their political standing. For instance, the Apocrypha. Goes against a LOT of the "established" Biblical beliefs, and as such was omitted, as well as the speculated Books of Mary Magdalene and Apostles who weren't Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John (but those could have been forged in their names, hence why it's speculated. But the omittances remain.). Then there's the Crusades, just because "their holy stuff should be OUR holy stuff because God said so." So there's plenty of holes in the Christian cloth, but I have no reason to judge them based on that. I don't think the actions of the former generations should sentence the lives of the latter generations. It's not all that fair. Have I met pushy, your-way-is-wrong, asshole Christians? Sure. But I know more decent ones than not and they are more attuned to simply living life well and not being a total bastard. I know I've totally divulged from what the original topic was about, but anything on that note I'd say to him has already been posted. Talk to her, etc. But I guess I like getting into these types of discussions.
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Supporting? I believe you need to read what I wrote again. Explaining something and supporting something are two different things.
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Ask her to prove Christianity isn't a work of fiction. That's all there is to it.
She can't, just like you can't prove yours. It's a belief. If she chooses to cast that aside, then obviously, she is narrow minded, and you should just ignore her if she ever mention religion. Just walk out.
BTW, I'm Catholic. But I don't like shoving religion down anyone's throat. I believe that is the worst way to help your cause.
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Why are you supporting the "typical reaction" when you already chastised him for generalizing the Christian faith?
Uzo is only explaining to him that his mother said that because she loves him and care for him, not supporting any side, being neutral. (I've seen that uzo tries to sound cold some times, but he is a kind guy, correct me if Im wrong since Im here for less than a month)
Also, my mom has came at me with a knife more than once over living my life in a way she didn't much care for, pitched unopened soda cans at my head for just going out with friends after work (I'm 27 btw), even threatened me with a tire iron when I had an auto accident, 'cuz, ya know, accident implies "calculated action" in her world when it comes to me. I'm sure she'll do half of this shit again before we're dead; I'm sure she's got new crazy cookin' up for me as I'm typing this, she's just got to wait for me slip up.
Wow, are you okay right now? Now I see why you choose that kind of study. It's hard when these type of things happen and you knows that the person doing that still loves you and so you cant hate them for doing that, Its only their own way of caring for us...
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I know how Uzo is, Lelygax. I've long since come to just take it in stride.
What I meant, Uzo, is that you gave him shit for generalizing the Christian faith, but then explained the generalized reaction most would have in this scenario. Accurate though it may be, that seems a bit contradictory to me.
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Since we're getting away from the original topic why not discuss something less volatile like politics or the pros and cons of abortion? :rollseyes: let's just make sure not to get carried away guys.
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Also, my mom has came at me with a knife more than once over living my life in a way she didn't much care for, pitched unopened soda cans at my head for just going out with friends after work (I'm 27 btw), even threatened me with a tire iron when I had an auto accident, 'cuz, ya know, accident implies "calculated action" in her world when it comes to me. I'm sure she'll do half of this shit again before we're dead; I'm sure she's got new crazy cookin' up for me as I'm typing this, she's just got to wait for me slip up.
Seriously dude, if your mother actually acts like this then call the police! This is bullshit. No mother in her right mind should ever have to act this way towards anyone, especially to her child. I'm thinking that her beliefs have given her a somewhat twisted mindset, kinda like the darkside of the force does to the Sith. Personally I believe (and no offense to you) that she might be mentally unstable. She should be psycho-analyzed. You are an adult and have protection rights under the law. You need to sit your mother down (forcefully if necessary) and lay out the cold hard facts. You don't need to take that from her or anyone else for that matter. You are your own person and have the right to feel safe and believe in whatever you want. If your mother can't or refuses to understand that? Cut her out of your life as she'll only be a liability. Harsh? Yes, but it might just be the thing that she needs to get with the modern program.
Goes against a LOT of the "established" Biblical beliefs, and as such was omitted, as well as the speculated Books of Mary Magdalene and Apostles who weren't Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John (but those could have been forged in their names, hence why it's speculated. But the omittances remain.)
You're quite correct. In fact there are 44 volumes of the bible that were deliberately cut from the final printing.
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What I meant, Uzo, is that you gave him shit for generalizing the Christian faith, but then explained the generalized reaction most would have in this scenario. Accurate though it may be, that seems a bit contradictory to me.
Perhaps on the face of things that is true, but you're missing the context of it all.
There is always going to be a certain overlap of common beliefs in a religion. That's why it is a religion in the first place. It is the essence of people with common beliefs joining together. The act of generational in itself, like many things, is neutral. it can be good or bad.
The separation here is where his comment was a baseless assumption, having no direct tie to the faith itself, while mine was an observation and grounded in the faith. It is the same difference between: "All Christians are hypocrites!" and "All Christians believe in Jesus."
But again, there is a wholly different purpose here. I offer a potential explanation for an event, he offers an insult and means to discredit another religion, and those who follow it.
Are they both basic forms of generalization? Yes, logically that is undeniable. I could have been strictly explicit but, I assumed the average person would have picked up on the context without batting an eye lash.
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Fair enough.
Also, my mom has came at me with a knife more than once over living my life in a way she didn't much care for, pitched unopened soda cans at my head for just going out with friends after work (I'm 27 btw), even threatened me with a tire iron when I had an auto accident, 'cuz, ya know, accident implies "calculated action" in her world when it comes to me. I'm sure she'll do half of this shit again before we're dead; I'm sure she's got new crazy cookin' up for me as I'm typing this, she's just got to wait for me slip up.
That's pretty fucked up. It should never get to that point.
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Wow, are you okay right now? Now I see why you choose that kind of study. It's hard when these type of things happen and you knows that the person doing that still loves you and so you cant hate them for doing that, Its only their own way of caring for us...
lol Yeah, I'm fine, thanks. We joke about it now-when she's cooking, I'll usually hear, "Lay yer head down on muh block, sister (chopping block) & I'll saw right through that neck o' yers." We giggle, I doing so partly because her thick accent "gets me tickled" (I lawlz), then I try to teach her "proper talk" (what southerners here say to people with northern accents), she gives me the finger & we move on. I had an odd upbringing, that's for sure. I was pretty unhappy with it as a kid, that's for damn sure. But I'm seeing some silver lining now & well, I'm gonna be pretty okay I think.
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That's pretty fucked up. It should never get to that point.
lol Yeah, at the time I was weird-ed out of course. But I'm honestly used to it & she's SERIOUSLY gotten way better. We haven't been in a physical altercation in 7 years this Christmas. Our fights have slowed down-are they still there though? Of course. I'm not faultless; I've blown up at her before, said some things I regret, hurt her feelings. Never gotten physical with her though (unless you count pitching a funsize candy bar at her out of rage when I was 13). I guess my point is she's not necessarily a monster, just...well, there's a lot there, a lot in her past that I can see where all this stems from.
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Depends. Was the candy bar closer to being stale or fresh?
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Well, things with my mom are finally being patched up. She still insists that she thinks I'm taking the wrong path and openly hopes that this is just a "phase", but she's less condemning about my faith at this point.
Though we had an interesting moment a while ago, where she made a comment about "how small my gods are" because a single Æsir or Vanir was not all-powerful and all-knowing like the Christian deity. I simply replied that at Odin's table, all are welcome, even if the guest would rather act like a know-it-all and pretend the others didn't exist, though that guest's behavior would end up pissing off Thor and getting the guest hammered. But hey. That's Thor's problem, and not the Allfather's.
And she laughed!
Going ahead and counting that as a small victory.
there's a lot there, a lot in her past that I can see where all this stems from.
Sorry, but I think at some point someone has to move beyond the past and just admitting that they're a screwed up person. Charging at their child with a knife is usually considered to be well AFTER that point for good reasons.
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Seriously dude, if your mother actually acts like this then call the police! This is bullshit. No mother in her right mind should ever have to act this way towards anyone, especially to her child. I'm thinking that her beliefs have given her a somewhat twisted mindset, kinda like the darkside of the force does to the Sith. Personally I believe (and no offense to you) that she might be mentally unstable. She should be psycho-analyzed. You are an adult and have protection rights under the law. You need to sit your mother down (forcefully if necessary) and lay out the cold hard facts. You don't need to take that from her or anyone else for that matter. You are your own person and have the right to feel safe and believe in whatever you want. If your mother can't or refuses to understand that? Cut her out of your life as she'll only be a liability. Harsh? Yes, but it might just be the thing that she needs to get with the modern program.
Ya know, an ex & I got into so many fights over that. I just couldn't go to the law because I knew I'd be ostracized by the entire family, save my Nana (man, I LOVE MY NANA...that's not sarcasm, she's a good woman). Also, my thoughts were always, "She's my mommy...she'll get better, I know it!". Well, she did, but only AFTER I quit speaking to her for 2 years. So yeah, shit's better now. I'm still not treated as an adult, there are a few altercations (the last one that I don't exactly count was when she threw cans of unopened soda at me for going out with friends-she mised on purpose of course), she still pulls some old tricks like trying to start public fights, but hey, I've come to accept that that's how it's gonna be until I'm married because when I was with someone she liked, this shit didn't happen. Penis = complete protection from all bad things...yeah. She's almost 70 & I believe wholeheartedly that some of this terminal craziness stems from her generation; I mean, think about it-we're living in a SUPER backwoods, small community in the south...and I'm talking about right now. This hole was a flippin' dirt road with about 6 buildings back in her day, I shit you not. My mom was a young lady in the late 40's to the late 50's...there wasn't a whole lot of women's lib & empowerment back then. Kinda the opposite. She was made to drop out of high school at age 16 by her father because he told her, and I quote, "Women hain't got no business in school atter they learn how to read n' write. You belong at home with ye mommy, tendin' to them young'uns (she has 6 brothers & 1 sister, of which she's the oldest). Men go to work & women stay home." Yeah...so let's fast forward to my dad. Heavy drinking, totally irresponsible big kid, wild child, spoiled partyboy. He forbade her to learn how to drive. So, my mom would wait until he was passed, steal his keys & drive up & down the dirt roads until she learned how to drive a stick shift '47 Ford coupe all by herself. That sounds awesome possum, but keep in mind this around 1965-67-driving a '47 model car back then is like me driving '94 Tercel now. Anyways, bottom line-she had a shitty life from what I can gather through first hand accounts, a.k.a., my brothers who were there for it. Does that excuse her? Not by a long shot. Does it explain her crazy? Yeah, to a point, I like to think so. There's a lot more of course, but since I've written a book, I'll cut this here. Also, this sounds like some pretty personal stuff, I understand that; but this place is like a second home to me & as it's been said in a separate topic (Laughing & Crying At The Same Time) there's going to be respect here if your post warrants it, this is a safe place. Man, it's good to be home. <3
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Well, things with my mom are finally being patched up. She still insists that she thinks I'm taking the wrong path and openly hopes that this is just a "phase", but she's less condemning about my faith at this point.
Though we had an interesting moment a while ago, where she made a comment about "how small my gods are" because a single Æsir or Vanir was not all-powerful and all-knowing like the Christian deity. I simply replied that at Odin's table, all are welcome, even if the guest would rather act like a know-it-all and pretend the others didn't exist, though that guest's behavior would end up pissing off Thor and getting the guest hammered. But hey. That's Thor's problem, and not the Allfather's.
And she laughed!
Going ahead and counting that as a small victory.
Sorry, but I think at some point someone has to move beyond the past and just admitting that they're a screwed up person. Charging at their child with a knife is usually considered to be well AFTER that point for good reasons.
Glad you worked things out with your mom. *thumbs up* Also, sorry for kinda commandeering your original topic with my mile long posts. Completely unintentional.
And I see your point with my own past mom problems, appreciate you backing me up. But I think that the things that happened in her past were so traumatizing though that they've genuinely caused this psychosis. Could she get over them? With professional intervention, perhaps. But that's frowned heavily upon in our community (I feel like I'm trying to explain "the old ways" of some indigenous tribe...). Is that right? Of course not, we've had knock down, drag out arguments over that. I do my damnedest to bring her into a new age, believe me fellas. I haven't lost hope yet.
She did wrong, yes, but in her own weird ways she's apologized to me for it & many other things that have bothered me over the years. Hell, she outright said she was sorry to me when I told her about somethings that made me cry when I was 8. My jaw DROPPED when I heard, "...oh. Mommy didn't know...sissy, honey, I'm sorry." That was a beautiful, wonderful victory to me. I couldn't help but imagine it like a bridge had just been built between two small islands, connecting them & allowing for us to actually meet, to know & understand each other better. I suck at analogies, but there ya go. But yeah, the bottom line is that emotions other than anger are HIGHLY frowned upon in this house (we were raised like British royalty, just poor). That was QUITE the victory for me.
I also want to point out that she was a "good mom" in other areas-always made sure I had good Christmases, birthdays, all that jazz-in her own really, REALLY odd way I believe she cares for me. She genuinely believed that she was looking out for me by trying to keep me a social recluse. Also wanted to point out she's like, way, WAY against religion, but believes in God, which I find quite lovely. You'll never hear someone denounce "Sunday Christians" (fake Christians) & self-righteous, holier than though assholes like she does. She actually took a good ol' regular Baptist preacher to court for not giving her & my family time enough to move out of their apartment when he purchased the building before he went in while everyone was gone to work & school, threw all of their furniture (and I mean threw, as in broke some stuff) outside, let it rain on it, ruining a brand new t.v. she had just bought. The community was PISSED to say the least & tried every way they could to dissuade her from following through. She couldn't begin to tell me how many people were hung up on, or had a door slammed in their smug faces. She took him to court, won & he paid to replace everything. I wasn't even alive back then, but gosh darn it if I'm not proud of her for it to this day.
We're better than we were, I have my mom back in my life, but we're so not perfect. She'll never be like what I would assume most people consider a "normal" mom. At the end of it all though, I love her no matter what she does...she's my mom. It's s simple as that, but complex on many levesl as well. That's how it will always be.
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Depends. Was the candy bar closer to being stale or fresh?
Slightly stale. More of that in-between stage.
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She actually took a good ol' regular Baptist preacher to court for not giving her & my family time enough to move out of their apartment when he purchased the building before he went in while everyone was gone to work & school, threw all of their furniture (and I mean threw, as in broke some stuff) outside, let it rain on it, ruining a brand new t.v. she had just bought. The community was PISSED to say the least & tried every way they could to dissuade her from following through. She couldn't begin to tell me how many people were hung up on, or had a door slammed in their smug faces. She took him to court, won & he paid to replace everything. I wasn't even alive back then, but gosh darn it if I'm not proud of her for it to this day.
Dude! Your Ma has earned my respect! I'd give this paragraph a thumb's up but that icon doesn't exist... :'(
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Why not +1 the post? It's pretty much the same thing.
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Done ;) +1
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Anyone else feel like this topic was taking a turn toward this?
Combichrist - God Warrior (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IKcc2oin-Q#ws)
(https://castlevaniadungeon.net/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg270.imageshack.us%2Fimg270%2F5674%2Fdarksided2tn.jpg&hash=cb9937566cba13dbd953a7fe89b67cda0a7b0c50)
(https://castlevaniadungeon.net/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lxewsfcHSU1r0bfqx.gif&hash=f7105cbea10c2868541e150eb7610226469d54ff)
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lol I can't stand that mouthy old psycho broad. Met too many like her in my day.
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And who might that be?
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Hm, that woman looks slightly familiar. I may have seen that in a youtube trap once.
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Well, the video should have made it obvious who she is.
She's the God Warrior. A crazy, psycho woman on the reality show Trading Spouses. She was a religious fanatic who had to live in a talk radio guru's home while the radio guru had to live in her home. Religious nutcase in a pagan house, pagan in a Southern religious family house. The episode kinda made you feel sorry for the pagan gal because everyone around her in the nutjob's circle of acquaintances ostracized her.
But when the gaptoothed woman got back home, she flipped out and went on a tirade about how ungodly the family of "dark siders" were. She became an instant internet sensation. The band Combichrist mixed over the soundclip of her tantrum for their song "God Warrior".
Here's her tantrum:
God warrior! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3mDLsyn6ns#)
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Topic closed at the request of the topic creator.