Topic: Change of plans, Death old boy!

[Twizman]

Death: ... Lord Dracula?

Dracula: Oh, Hi, Death. Just brainstorming ideas for arenas.

Death: Arenas? What is all this? Why do you have your monsters rebuilding and redesigning your entire castle?

Dracula: Change of plans, Death old boy!

Death: And how come I'm always the last to hear of them.

Dracula: Because you always say my ideas are stupid. Yet what has listening to you gotten me? over Five hundred years of having my ass kicked by Belmonts, Morrises, and my own son! So for this huge 1999 battle, I've decided to go a bit differently.

Death: Though I know I will regret hearing this, I must ask what you're going to do differently.

Dracula: Well, I've tried making my castles huge deathtraps with impossible jumps and annoyingly placed creatures, and that didn't stop anybody. I've tried making them mazes, guarded by immense bosses and filled with monsters, and that didn't stop anybody either. So now, I'm going for the fighting route.

Death: The 'Fighting Route?'

Dracula: Instead of a horde of monsters, the Belmonts will only have to fight a handful of my most powerful minions. One at a time, in different areas.

Death: So what's all this then?

Dracula: Seeing how many arenas for combat I can get out of my castle and the surrounding grounds. We're overseeing where we can put in nice, round, flat arenas where the Belmont can take on my minions, one on one, in a 2 out of 3 match.

Death: Already what my mind would be had I internal organs would be sending messages to the rest of my nonexistant organs to start foaming at the mouth and collapse to the ground in spasmatic fits. What the HELL kind of plan is that? You're just going to have the Belmonts take on a few minions, rather than all of them? And you're redesigning your castle for easy access to flat planes? How is THIS going to make anything tougher?

Dracula: For one thing, I needed something special for my 1999 comeback. Second, I've done some studying about this style of battling. Apparently, it'll be an inevitablility that at least two, if not more, of the protagonists will actually fight each other in one of these arenas before the end. Third, I have chanelled the power of something called the 'SNK Boss Syndrome.' From what I can understand, it'll make me nearly invincible.

Death: "SNK Boss Syndrome?"

Dracula: Yep.

Death: Nevermind what I said earlier. This is the best plan ever.

Dracula: Good. Now, you're going to be part of the final boss rush. However, I think I'm going to have you be the third-to-last boss.

Death: The THIRD to last boss? Years of loyal servitude has only earned me the THIRD last boss?

Dracula: Well, fourth if you include my final form, treated as a different boss. But yeah, There's one more person after you.

Death: Who dares usurp my position as your right-hand personification of the end of life and your confidant?

Dracula: Alucard. Something about marketing and appeal to the fanboys and girls, so the powers say.

Death: *Sigh* I remember back when I was the final boss...


Note: I did not write this dialogue. I found it on a Castlevania board on Gamefaqs. I don't know the author.

[dark_soul]

hahahahaha that's weird SNK boss syndrome? Alucard being the 2nd to the 3rd boss? hahahaha i wish a comedy of flash game like this comes out XD nice one justewins 

[Xain]

That was entertaining.

[darkwzrd4]

Hilarious. What is SNK Boss syndrome anyway?

[Slayer]

In Reply To #4

In SNK fighting games (Samurai Shodown, King of Fighters), the final boss in the games would be extremely overpowered to the point that the only way you were going to beat them was putting about a life-savings worth of quarters into the damn NeoGeo Arcade cabinet. If you play one of these games in an arcade, make sure you're in the Fortune 500.

[child_of_lileth]

lol. the part about the alucard fan service made me laugh the most