Topic: Wow Mom. A work of fiction? REALLY?

[Lumi Kløvstad]

First off, you should know that I'm a follower of Asatru, which is a modern name for the religion of my ancestors, the Vikings (or more properly the modern incarnation of said religion).

I consult my Gods whenever I feel I should, and I do my best to bring them honor and glory, even if I cannot do so through battle as my ancestors did.

My parents (whom I still live with until I ship off to college later this year) are dyed in the wool Christians, and my sister just... doesn't care. Christian on paper, but never actually goes to church or does anything particularly religious. We've all met the type.

Anyway, I was speaking to my mother about some of the old stories of Odin and Frigga a few days ago (specifically where Odin learns what makes a true hero), and she smiled (kind of) and said "they're nice stories, but it hurts me that you would follow fictional characters instead of the One God."

I expected THOSE particular words from many other people. But never my own mother.

I wasn't telling the story with intent to convert her from Christianity, merely because I, like my ancestors, thought she might find the story enlightening or entertaining.

So it greatly offends me that she would say such a thing about my religion and beliefs (which is the first belief system I've ever felt truly comfortable with) especially when I would never try to sway HER from Christianity, which has obviously worked well for her but not for me.

Between most Christians I've now met and my mother, my impressions are now that the tenants of "love thy neighbor", "tolerance", and "judge not lest ye be judged" of Christianity are upheld by it's followers merely when convenient, and I know these kinds of impressions can be greatly damaging if they are permitted to persist.
I know that Thor would tell me to be strong, Odin would urge me to keep a cool head and behave rationally and responsibly, and Freyja would tell me to love my mother, even if she does not believe the way I do.

And I really want to do these things, because I believe in that sort of wisdom. But right now it's hard. If I walked up to you and called your beliefs a work of fiction, I doubt that you'd take it very well either. It's hard enough coming from a stranger, but harder still coming from your own mother whom you have lived with and trusted completely for 23 years.

It shouldn't matter who a person worships as divine, as long as that worship shapes them into a good and honorable person, in my opinion.

So I'd like some advice from my internet family, who I'm frankly feeling better about at the moment. Do I let this lie, do I try to talk to my mother about it, or do I do something else?

[Flame]

The old Viking religions are still followed today? That's pretty badass. I didnt know that.

I can't offer advice, other than try and talk to your Mother and explain to her how you feel. Would she say the same about Hinduism, for example? or Buddhism? Christianity, Islam, and Judaism all follow the same main God, so that's why there's a certain kind of tolerance there, despite radically different ways of practice. But would she consider Hinduism, for example, to be "fun stories" or Buddha to be "an amusing chubby character"? or does she feel that way merely because the Norse Gods have become part of modern pop culture by now, along with the Vikings themselves, much like Pirates or Ninjas have?

Or for a twist, ask her how she would feel if you considered the Bible just "fun stories" and that you are disappointed she would "follow fictional characters instead of the true Gods".

Talk. Talking is key. Try to make her understand how you feel.

[VladCT]

Of course you should talk about it, but, uh...

Or for a twist, ask her how she would feel if you considered the Bible just "fun stories" and that you are disappointed she would "follow fictional characters instead of the true Gods".

This might not be so advisable if she were as hard-line as you make her out to be. She might take it the wrong way and think you actually feel that way, and...the consequences might be rather grave...

[uzo]

OK, let me get this straight. You talked to a member of another region about your own different religion, and expected them to take your story seriously? You have some very strange expectations. You were setting yourself up for failure right there.

Also, nice generalizing by labeling all Christians you know as hypocrites, you drunk barbaric viking.

[Gunlord]

To be fair, Uzo, it was his mother. It's not *that* strange to expect Mom to cut you a little extra slack.

That said, if all your mother said was that she's "sad" you don't follow her religion, I don't think that's much to complain about. As uzo noted, not all Christians are like that, but there are some who're better and some who're quite a bit worse (and this goes for all religions too--and non-religions as well, come to think about it). If I were you, I'd just let this lie. People (including family members) have called things I believed in very strongly "silly" for a long time. Part of having beliefs, and part of being a responsible adult in regards to those beliefs, is an understanding that many if not most people will not only disagree with them but find them to be ludicrous or stupid. If that's all they think, shrug your shoulders and agree to disagree--it's no skin off your back, and more importantly, if your beliefs turn out to be correct, it's their problem, not yours.

[Ratty]

To be fair, Uzo, it was his mother. It's not *that* strange to expect Mom to cut you a little extra slack.

That said, if all your mother said was that she's "sad" you don't follow her religion, I don't think that's much to complain about. As uzo noted, not all Christians are like that, but there are some who're better and some who're quite a bit worse (and this goes for all religions too--and non-religions as well, come to think about it). If I were you, I'd just let this lie. People (including family members) have called things I believed in very strongly "silly" for a long time. Part of having beliefs, and part of being a responsible adult in regards to those beliefs, is an understanding that many if not most people will not only disagree with them but find them to be ludicrous or stupid. If that's all they think, shrug your shoulders and agree to disagree--it's no skin off your back, and more importantly, if your beliefs turn out to be correct, it's their problem, not yours.

Pretty much this, but do expect it to come up again around Christmas. You're about to go to college so you're at a very formative stage of your life right now. It's cliche but true that you are "discovering yourself" and your parents are probably hoping that your new belief system is a phase you will grow out of, which it may or may not be.
I spent years studying religions before I decided on my path (none of the above) and one thing I have come to understand is that people are very defensive about their religion.

Since a faith-based belief system is by definition founded on stories and customs grounded in belief without evidence, getting the agreement of a group is important to people. "God really exists right guys?" "Yeah yeah of course he does." that kind of thing, and dissenters who challenge this group reinforcement are to be dealt with harshly. Moreover your mother and father's religion does not allow for other gods unlike Hinduism or the other prominent eastern faiths.
With the Abrahamic tradition it is (or has become) an all-or-nothing deal. When you tell her you believe in other gods, you're telling her you don't think her god exists or is the true God. So consider that your mom likely views your choosing another faith as a diss to her own, just as she has dismissed yours.

Coupled with this your parents may sincerely believe that you (like all non-Christians) are being purposely misled by the devil and/or demons. It was (and I believe still is) a common tactic of Christian missionaries to preach that local Gods such as Odin and Thor are demons trying to keep people from Yahweh, and the idea has persisted. They may be thinking that if you continue to worship the way you do you will be sentenced to eternal torture, which would make most parents sad.

PS - If it's any help you can tell her that in Viking graves that have been excavated there have been individuals who had with them symbols of both Mjölnir and the Christian cross. So some of your ancestors may have been looking to hedge their spiritual bets even back then.

[Mooning Freddy]

Well, Sigurd, all I can tell you is this:
My grandmother has a huge, two-part Soviet encyclopedia of religion. It's a really good one, with loads of info about all religions and beliefs known to history. I doubt there are encyclopedias today which are as good as this one.
You know how it's called? It's called: "Mythology of the world's nations"

When you think about the word mythology, what comes to mind is usually tales about ancient Greece, Scandinavia or Babylonia.
But not in this encyclopedia. Alongside tales about Zeus, Thor and Baal, there are tales about Christ, Muhammad and Buddha.
I once used to think, isn't it extremely offensive to Christians and Muslims that their history is seen as equal to ancient mythology, which almost nobody believes in anymore? But than I thought about it, and said "meh". Why should you discriminate between religions? It's quite the hypocrisy. Either you respect all religions or you ditch all religions. It's all about equality. 

[Havatchu]

What does a middle eastern man that claims to be the son of The One True God have anything to do with people of European ancestry? Not much.

As far as I think not many people would follow monotheistic (Hinduism and Buddhism are probably also guilty of oppressing other peoples with their polytheism) religions if it weren't for them sticking their noses into "heathens" business.

[uzo]

To be fair, Uzo, it was his mother. It's not *that* strange to expect Mom to cut you a little extra slack.

I'd actually contest that it is the opposite. Think about it; A christian mother hearing her son talk about worshiping heathen gods, in her eyes something that would damn him to hell for an eternity of torture. For her, this is grounds for intervention, much less dismissing it as fiction. The typical reaction here is to get him set straight before it's too late.

[Nagumo]

I think it's a bit arrogant to think one's religion is "the correct faith" and all the rest were made up by people who were obviously on crack or something like that. Perhaps all religions have some sort of truth to them? If you want to believe in Norse gods but don't want to upset your family why don't you just say your believes might be compatible with theirs? Perhaps the Norse gods were actually angels and people mistook took them to be gods? I'm not religious at all but it's an interesting way to approach things.         

[Grimlock78]

In situations like this,it would probably best to maybe talk about it when you think is right . All religions have their own ways of solving problems like this,and if you're uncomfortable with your mom's sudden change of religion no problem in talking.This is how I felt when I found out my brother was an atheist.

[Mooning Freddy]

I like to approach religion from a historical point of view, and to say the least, I think it's damn amazing how such a tiny nation as the Jews, which didn't have a history of magnificence as other nations like the Assyrians, Persians or Greeks, managed to spread belief in their god to most of the world. To be fair, I have to say the Jewish faith in a universal god was very revolutionary 2000 years ago, when most of the world had conceptions of local gods, i.e. believed that every part of the world has its own gods and that people who travel around the world should respect the local gods. I can see how belief in a universal god can appeal to people, especially politicians who sought world dominance like the Romans.
Of course, then nations used their gods as a political tool, which isn't unusual. If you want people to follow you back then, you needed to show them you have (a) god on your side.

So my point is: religion should only be judged by the historical period when they appeared. The tales of Jesus and Muhammad are very similar: both revolutionaries, both disliked the communities they lived in because they were corrupt and immoral. The difference is that Muhammad gained political power and recognition in his lifetime, while Jesus only centuries after his death.

So in the past people fought each other in the name of their gods, while in fact the true reasons for fighting were political.
Today people believe in the same god, but fight because they disagree on his right way of living, and this is often an illusion as well, covering the true, political reasons of fighting.

Plato and Aristotle explained this centuries before Jesus and Muhammad walked the earth. Now THOSE are people worthy of my worship!

[Grimlock78]

You my friend freddy just made a very valid and informational point . You sir have earned a gold medal wonderful job! *claps* I am being serious good point.

[Flame]

Word, good stuff, Freddy.

[Havatchu]

So in the past people fought each other in the name of their gods, while in fact the true reasons for fighting were political.
Today people believe in the same god, but fight because they disagree on his right way of living, and this is often an illusion as well, covering the true, political reasons of fighting.

Examples being land, money, resources, and "glory"?