What drives me to live this life? I just don't want to die. And maybe some other reasons.
Whether it's a fear of death, or simply because non-existance sounds unsatisfying, I have no idea.
My thoughts stay on life rather than death. I've lost so much, yet I've never let that bring me down. I always look forward to the future, with my head up, and I'm ready to tackle head-on the painful crap life throws at me, rather than submit to it.
And yeah, occassionally I thought about suicide. At one point, I was entirely prepared to do it. But then I thought about, "What would I be leaving behind? How will people remember me?" I don't want to be remembered as someone who submits. I want to have a lasting effect on the world, or at least the people who knew me.
If that means anything. :\